You know, there is no one more beautiful than a pregnant woman. There is happiness in the eyes. There is love in the heart. There is a blush on the cheeks. And inside there is a little life.
He made her a position she couldn't refuse.
I want happiness. Such little happiness. With tiny arms and legs. And with his eyes.
Under the moon and sun, troubles will pass by, bypassing our house with you. We'll watch the sparks by the fireplace. You will become a mother, and I will become a father.
Happiness is when your weight increases not from extra calories, but from the fact that your little miracle lives inside you.
Pregnancy for a woman is God’s providence, pregnancy for a man is a test of the sincerity of feelings.
The most incredible extreme sensation is waiting for the result of a pregnancy test!
And today I was kicked and jumped all night. What an interesting feeling it is when someone lives inside you.
Deciding to have a child means agreeing that from now on and forever your heart will run separately from you.
Where can you buy happiness? - Happiness cannot be bought, it can be born.
The best hairstyle is clean hair, the best makeup is healthy sleep, the best figure is pregnancy.
Nine months give new life to at least three lives at once.
"Leonid S. Sukhorukov"
The day when there are three of us will be the happiest day of my life.
The woman is unique! Only in it can two hearts beat.
I know one thing, that happiness grows in my stomach. It is the most precious thing that can be.
I thought my head was spinning from love, but it turned out it was from pregnancy.
God gave me an unspeakable miracle - I will become wiser, I will be a mother. Your heart beats like a butterfly inside me - I’ll wake up, smile, and it will smile. It will not betray, it will be a joy, a piece of me, a golden falling star.
Given my taste preferences, I’m generally afraid of getting pregnant. I might want wool or machine oil. Or take over Bulgaria.
The first pregnancy is for the wedding. The second is about money. Third - they wanted a girl. The fourth, fifth and subsequent ones - let them run, it’s a pity or something.
Not all men understand the value of human life, which has just arisen in a woman, they do not protect it like a crystal vessel with clean water, they do not understand that this is a gift from God, for which God will ask them... he will certainly ask them.
Pregnancy is the result of a bodily celebration with all the consequences that flow into it.
"Igor Subbotin"
What a strange bliss to realize that there, inside, perfection is growing and maturing, our angel, the fruit of our love.
There are now two hearts inside me... I have nowhere to go from happiness... and I don’t want to go anywhere... I will enjoy it!
Nothing can be better than holding a piece of yourself in your arms.
Let's make money! Let's win love! We will achieve success! Happiness... And we will give birth to happiness!
At 9 a.m., a pregnancy test showed that my wife was pregnant, and at 10 a.m. we were already arguing, arguing about which college the child should go to.
Love is when you carry his child under your heart, and when he comes home from work he gently hugs you and kisses your belly.
Why don't you want to sleep?
Are you tossing and turning all night?
I love you, son...
Or maybe a daughter?
Truly happy is the girl who carries under her heart a child conceived from her beloved man.
It’s so wonderful to wake up in the morning with peace in your soul, with love in your heart, with light music in your head and with a tiny life inside.
There is no more valuable and treasured gift from a loved one than a new little heart beating inside you!
It’s not a sin to be jealous when girls in front of you at the pharmacy take tampons, and you buy a pregnancy test.
No guy can understand that 3 minutes are worth a lot when you are waiting for a pregnancy test to be given to you.
Best status:
– My dear dear cat, love makes your tummy grow. There’s a little paw in it that will squeak and say “DADDY.”
– Darling, please give me three magic words that will unite the hearts of lovers forever. – I’m pregnant, my love!
It's time to buy a red marker, a pregnancy test and get ready for the wedding!
– Man, are you pregnant?!! You're behaving like a capricious pregnant lady!
– Am I paying much attention to your words? - Well, no, it’s not every day that I hear from a man: “Your task is to give birth to my child!”
There is no more valuable and precious cargo in the world than the little desired toddler in a mother’s tummy.
Every peasant has known from time immemorial that in order for a goose or turkey to become fat for the New Year, it is hung in a net and force-fed. In other words, he is deprived of the ability to move and is fed for slaughter. And in 2-3 weeks it is ready.
The inscription on the maternity hospital: hey, hey, vagrants!
Selling pregnancy test... positive
I went for some fresh air to work up an appetite. And, judging by her belly, she had a good time. – A.V. Ivanov
- my bunny. - Yes my Sunshine! – and when will we have sunbeams?
In order not to feel sick from many people around you, you can get pregnant and then you will feel sick from one - Evgeniy Khankin
Envy is when you buy a pregnancy test at the pharmacy, and the girl in front of you buys tampons.
Calendar reform does not shorten gestational age. – Stanislaw Jerzy Lec
It’s so cool when your boyfriend tells you: “Dress warmly, you still have to give birth to my children!”
Desirable elastic bands are things for hooks. – A.V. Ivanov
A Catholic woman is already allowed to avoid pregnancy with the help of mathematics, but she is strictly forbidden to resort to chemistry or physics. – Henry Louis Mencken
... Girls live in a world of fears. They are afraid of never getting pregnant and afraid of getting pregnant...
The inscription at the entrance to the Chinese maternity hospital: Enough!!!
The safest way to protect yourself is with your mouth. – A.V. Ivanov
Virtual communication leads to the virgin birth and birth of children with avatar faces and nicknames. – Elena Ermolova
You don't really know a guy until you ask him to put on a condom. – Madonna
Comment: Let me clarify right away - I won’t explain! – V. Galashev
Everything about a woman is a mystery, and the answer to everything is her pregnancy.
- Darling, you will soon become a dad! - Eh, I wanted to be an astronaut...
The problem not only went deeper, but also led to an unwanted pregnancy. – Mikhail Mamchich
Trusting half is like being a little pregnant. – Alexander Kargin-Utkin
Tell me, have there been any pregnant women in your family?
Once I crossed the threshold of motherhood, I suddenly became public property, the animated equivalent of a public park. This cutesy expression You're now eating for two, my dear, perfectly conveys the fact that even your dinner is no longer your business. Indeed, when the land of the free has mastered the methods of coercion, the expression You now eat for us implies that two hundred-odd million people poking around will object if you want to eat a donut with jam, rather than a full meal of organic products and vegetables, including all five major food groups. The right to command pregnant women will certainly be included in the Constitution.
A man walks into a pharmacy: “Two pregnancy tests and two validols.”
The most interesting situation is when a woman who finds herself in an interesting position is very interested in: which of the possible candidates for paternity put her in such an interesting position? – Yuri Tatarkin
It’s time to decorate not only T-shirts, but also wedding dresses with inscriptions... For example, the inscription is very relevant: NOT... PREGNANT!!! – Vladimir Borisov
A man is never space. And a pregnant woman in the second half of her pregnancy is at least a closed space for another human being.
The female body is like a clockwork: once you start it, it ticks for nine months. – Mikhail Mamchich
The Ryaba hen saw Faberge eggs and did not envy the hen who gave birth to these eggs... - Vladimir Borisov
The entire time I was pregnant with Kevin, I struggled with the very idea of Kevin, with the belief that I had demoted myself, from driver to car, from homeowner to home.
The best contraceptive is a glass of cold water: not before and not after, but instead. NN 1 Humor)
The best contraceptive is pregnancy.
Abortion, womb! palindrome) – Stepan Balakin
Dad, I'm pregnant, here's a list of suspects
A strained relationship with a condom is not a burden. – Evgeniy Khankin
Tests on are take-off green sticks. – Vladimir Borisov
You can't live like that! It's time to protect yourself! – Maya Chetvyortova
They say they have invented an absolutely reliable birth control pill. Too late. It would have been better if she had been the seed in the apple that the serpent offered to Eve. – Stanislaw Jerzy Lec
So in the heat of the moment they made me... - A.V. Ivanov
Any pregnant woman is like a Trojan horse.
The best time to study is pregnancy, because you study two in one. – Elena Ermolova
Pregnancy for a woman is God's providence, pregnancy for a man is a test of the sincerity of feelings...
There is a big difference between getting pregnant and getting pregnant!
A man is never space. And a pregnant woman in the second half of her pregnancy is at least a closed space for another human being.
Truly happy is the girl who carries under her heart a child conceived from a man.
Make it a rule to terminate your pregnancy during pregnancy.
Nothing spoils a woman more than a man.
Classic Pregnancy Quotes
A true family begins with the birth of a child...
Unfortunately, reproductive physiology is such that contact is necessary.
When she comes out, hold her nose, and I will blow into her mouth, the child will jump out of her.
Ultimate Classic Pregnancy Quotes
Before you get pregnant, you need to get married so that someone is obligated to have sex with you!
And today they kicked me and jumped me all night... What an interesting feeling it is when someone lives inside you :)
I am pregnant! - I don’t remember that we... - You were drunk! - I don’t remember getting that drunk!
Nowadays, on the bus, only another pregnant woman can give up her seat to a pregnant woman.
Children are flowers of life. How I want this bouquet for myself...
The only bright spot was a cheerful poster in pink tones and the inscription at the top: “Pregnancy is the natural state of a woman.” It turns out that until now I was in the unnatural?!
It’s so wonderful to wake up in the morning with peace in your soul, with love in your heart, with light music in your head and with a tiny life inside...
The first pregnancy is for the wedding. The second is about money. Third - they wanted. The fourth, fifth and subsequent ones - let them run, it’s a pity or something.
Pregnancy is a virus that is spread by men, but only women get sick.
Given my taste preferences, I’m generally afraid of getting pregnant. I might want wool or machine oil. Or take over Bulgaria.
No, Thomas. I'm not pregnant. - God bless! With your ears and my face, our children cannot be envied.
Compassionate Classic Pregnancy Quotes
I’m even curious what it’s like to find out that you’ll soon become a father? Did Tom shit his pants out of fear or was he just confused?
When we quarreled with your dad (and we quarreled mainly because it seemed to me that he did not correctly understand my whimsical charades, and therefore - oh, horror! - did not love me), he ran out for air, choking from an acute lack of words And I wrapped my arms around you over the ball of my stomach and sadly complained that they don’t understand us, they don’t love us, and we were left alone with you, but we won’t leave each other, we will never, and always understand without further ado... Your dad would return, place a blooming cherry plum branch in front of us, and say his meek “Forgive me.”
When I grow up and learn, I will write a movie about real childbirth. About how things really happen here. Very famous actors will star there, this is important. Everyone needs to know what it is to give birth to a human being. Maybe if we knew more about this side of complex human life, if we did not consider it only a female attraction, then there would be fewer wars?
The most powerful adrenaline rush is not a roller coaster, but waiting for the result of a pregnancy test!
A child is a message from God, made with love.
When a woman is about to give birth, nature does something to her, surrounds her with some kind of aura, gives her a special attractiveness...
Luxury Classic Pregnancy Quotes
Once I crossed the threshold of motherhood, I suddenly became public property, the animated equivalent of a public park. This cutesy expression “You're eating for two now, honey” perfectly conveys the fact that even your dinner is no longer your business. Indeed, when the land of the free has mastered the methods of coercion, the expression “Now you eat for us” implies that two hundred-odd million people poking around will begin to object if you want to eat a donut with jam, rather than a full meal from organic products and vegetables, including all five major food groups.
Girls, who wrote “Hurray, I’m not pregnant!” in the toilet in blood?
Pregnant women have a special energy; they radiate warmth.
They say that in order for a man to feel what pregnancy is, he needs to tie 1.5 kg of cereal to each leg, give him a sleeping pill, a diuretic, and tie something like a belly to his belt, and send him to work!
Do you want to be the father of my child? - What? - Just give me the cum.
Andrei was affectionate with her, calling her little blood, at first they didn’t even think about the kids, they just lived next to each other, enjoying their closeness, and that’s all. A child could even interfere with this happiness. But then, somehow, gradually, on the sly, just because there was a danger of violating the eternal order of family affairs, anxiety arose from somewhere that what they initially avoided and feared, now they began to watch - will it happen or won’t it? Months passed, nothing changed, and then the anticipation grew into impatience, then into fear.
If you have ever seen the eyes of a happy pregnant woman, then you will agree with me that no diamonds can compare with the beautiful sparkle of these eyes!
Why do you have to become ugly in order to give birth to a new creature?
In general, pregnant women are usually treated as weak-minded. Like, a normal person wouldn’t reach such a ridiculous state.
Humorous Classic Pregnancy Quotes
He moved, the child moved! - Oh my God! - No, wait... No, the elastic band on the panties broke.
Emilien, I'm in a position! - But how? - The wind blew. I forgot to close the window.
The little daughter came to her father and asked the little one: “Two stripes - okay?” Dad felt bad.
And I had no idea that the contemplation of a pregnant woman is so calming - as soon as I enter the subway car, all the guys sitting fall asleep...
Yeah... pregnancy is such a thing: sometimes it is affectionate and loving, sometimes... - Cruel, vindictive and castrating? - Well, I wanted to say “capricious”... - Well, there’s still more to come.
You are a sailor, I am a sailor. You are a fisherman, I am a fisherman. You are on land, I am at sea, How did you get pregnant?
The girl decided to inform her husband about her pregnancy in an original way - she renamed her name in her husband’s phone to the name “Stork”, and in the morning, when her husband left for work, she sent him an SMS: “I’ve already flown out... I’ll be there in about 8 months. .. Wait")))
I am pregnant. -Are you pregnant with a child? - How long have you been smelling these markers? Of course as a child!
An ultrasound showed that they will have... A WEDDING!
The entire time I was pregnant with Kevin, I struggled with the very idea of Kevin, with the belief that I had demoted myself, from driver to car, from homeowner to home.
Nowadays everyone gets married “on the fly,” but I don’t want that... But I want the person I love to take me as his wife, not because she’s pregnant, but because he loves me and can’t live without me for a second...
My girl has a bun in the oven and I guess you know who the damn baker is.
Waiting for the birth of a baby is an amazing state, filled with emotions. Therefore, the woman herself, and her family and friends, certainly need to post pregnancy statuses on their social networks. These statuses can express interesting behavior, unusual preferences and sudden changes in mood of the one who carries the baby under her heart.
Funny statuses about pregnancy
Of course, there is no humor without humor. Therefore, take note of the following statuses, which will definitely find their place on the pages of “Vkontakte”, “Odnoklassniki” and other social networks.
My friend started to get better
And they lie on the couch all day long,
She also fights with her stomach.
And that’s all because the children’s home is there.
I eat herring with chocolate,
Jellied meat with marmalade
Borscht with cake,
Cookies with radish,
Because in the stomach
I have a baby.
Some will say I'm strange.
That I don't know what I want.
I'll answer, no, that's not true,
I just want a sandwich
I'll season it with sausage
Apple and dried apricots,
And also jam, cheese,
To make the taste seem sweet.
Don't think badly
My baby just lives in my tummy.
I asked my husband for a cake
So that you don't feel sad.
But while he's going to the store,
I want cabbage.
And then I want herring,
Sweet sticks, honey.
He pleases all the time
Because darling knows
That I'm waiting for a baby.
Tastes are different.
Tears come from the desire for sweets.
And while I'm going to the store, I already need an orange.
The baby dictates the tastes to me, and then sits and savors it.
Statuses about pregnancy: beautiful, filled with emotions
Of course, women in this position are overwhelmed with emotions. Therefore, sometimes they really need to read statuses about pregnancy, which will bring tears to their eyes, and they will fully understand their condition. Please note the following options. Deep and meaningful statuses about pregnancy:
I won't harm myself while waiting for a miracle.
I will eat everything healthy,
Listen to lovely music.
I will study all the books and magazines,
Those in which they write about children.
And then I will sit quietly and listen to my little blood.
I studied all the sites,
I read the poems in them,
I also learned fairy tales
Songs of sonorous souls.
And now I’m sitting, singing,
And I'm expecting a baby.
I don't dress according to fashion
And in a way that is comfortable for the stomach,
Because its resident,
I value it very much.
So that his house does not pinch him,
No elastic bands, no belts,
I'll jump into a vest dress,
And I'll go for a walk in silence.
About pregnant women in verse
Of course, statuses about pregnancy - “waiting for a miracle” - are not just short or rhyming sayings. You can write entire poems about this situation.
A leg popped out on my stomach.
Oh, and this leg wants to run along the path.
But for now it sits in me, daughter or son
Sometimes disrupting the rhythms of my days and nights.
There, in the tummy, it’s warm, and you can clearly see,
When mommy doesn't sleep,
Every second is treasured
While she carries it within herself,
Home to the most beloved creature on Earth.
Even though pregnant women are sometimes strange,
But this strangeness was given to them from above, probably.
So that evil would not be noticed, the nervous system was protected.
And when the baby appears, they were fully aware of it.
Wonder women and their behavior in verse
Pregnancy with sarcasm or spice. They are also worth paying attention to.
I bought a test today
And a red felt-tip pen,
I'll draw two stripes
To hide fears.
Let him offer me his hand,
She will call you to get married.
And a beautiful bride
Then he will call.
I got up early today
I ironed it again
All diapers, vests,
The bed that was about to be made.
I'm ironing all the clothes again,
I'm checking the clasps
Because very soon
I'll see my baby.
The training camp has been going on for a month now.
Thinking of going on a trip?
Yes, practically right
But on this trip I need:
Diapers, napkins, pipettes,
Bottles, pacifiers, rompers, booties,
Envelope, cream, powder, saucers,
Oh, how can I not dodge,
Do not forget everything that is on the list,
When will I go to the maternity hospital?
Also, statuses about pregnancy, in anticipation of the most emotional meeting, can be short.
I went to the maternity hospital, I will return as a mother.
Today I put together a package that will give me a ticket to the maternity hospital.
Diapers, nappies, pacifiers, booties, clothes of course, and candy for yourself.
Soon my husband will be walking under the windows, my mother, father and grandmother too,
Because I will give birth to someone who is dearer to everyone’s life.
Boring, dull, monotonous life will end very soon,
Just hold on.
Little, sweet, pretty little bundle,
I don’t know if my daughter or son is sitting there.
But I feel a soft, gentle body,
Which knows where to go.
Express emotions and convey your experiences. It's so sweet and sensual.
